Looking Back on What Really Matters

When people lose a loved one, the pain is often so strong that they’d do anything to connect with that person again. I get a lot of calls during the early days of loss, and I always urge the bereaved to wait at least a few months before scheduling a reading.

It might seem strange that there’s a “waiting period,” but trust me – when a soul transitions, they have some work to do before they’re ready to come through to a medium. I never thought of passing over requiring a wait until I started talking to the dead on a regular basis – and then it made perfect sense.

So, based on my conversations with thousands of souls, here’s what they’re up to between the time they pass and the time they might come through to a medium or send you a sign that they’re around.

 

Passing Through the Veil.

First thing, when you pass, you have to “lighten up.” There are many heavy feelings and emotions we hang onto in life, like anger, resentment, judgement, jealousy, and insecurity. When you’re alive you know that those emotions are not doing you any good and you should probably let them go, but it’s hard to do.

Once you pass, you don’t have a choice. When you transition to Heaven you have to release the heavy emotions that weigh your energy down. Imagine trying to cross over dragging resentments and negative energy. Talk about baggage!  Heaven wouldn’t be heaven anymore. Transitioning is like passing through a veil or a filter, your energy has to be clear and light to come through.

 

The Life Review.

Have you ever been in a situation – maybe a class or a workshop – where you were learning something new, and afterwards you felt you needed to sit for a while to absorb what you’d learned? It’s the same thing you pass, except the “workshop” is your whole life.

When a soul transitions, they look back on their time on earth as if they’re watching a movie – only from their new perspective, they can see the events very, very, clearly. Without justifying or getting defensive, they review their life, with all its twists and turns. Some souls take longer than others to complete their review and progress to the next level. They might even have some tasks to do to help them raise their vibration.

It’s kind of like AA in that way – you have to acknowledge what you’ve done and sometimes make amends before you can move on.

 

Making Amends.

The life review shines a light on what really matters in life. When you’re on the other side, you’re no longer attached to your career, your bank balance or your body fat ratio. That’s all fine when you’re alive, but you leave that stuff behind when you die.

What you look back on is the love and compassion you shared, the people you helped, and the difference you made in the world. You also see the unfinished business and the  people you hurt. You become fully aware of the ripple effect your behavior had on others. Luckily, it’s never too late to make amends.

When a soul has completed their life review, that’s when they can come through to the living and make things right.

 

I can think of many examples:

  • A woman came to my event and immediately her mother came through apologized for making her daughter feel so guilty for putting her is assisted living.
  • A man came through and said that he wished that he could take back the vicious letter he had left for his wife blaming her for his death. He was bipolar and had killed himself, but he regretted blaming her. Looking back, he realized that his problems had nothing to do with her.
  • An older woman begged me to let her son know that she should never have pressured him to spend so much time with her, and neglect his own children. She realized in her life review that she was being selfish.

The process of passing over, letting go of negative emotions and looking back on life is a gift that allows the soul to evolve. They have the opportunity to let go of any grudges or negative feelings,  go through their life review, and then, when the time is right, help their loved ones on earth to learn from their experience and feel their love.

 

Forgiveness from Heaven

As a medium I never know who will come through and try to talk to me. I will say I find the best readings happen when someone comes through that you are not expecting to hear from. Because of the life review sometimes souls that you never got or have a closeness with will sometimes come through. For example I recently had a woman’s father come through who she never got to know because he left home when she was just a child. Because of his selfish ways, she never eve knew he died until years later.

After he passed on, he was able to see the hurt and pain he caused his daughter by her not having a Father in her life. He came through with a message for her and explained his actions. He wanted her to know that he took full responsibility and that he was sorry. Because of this message she felt she could finally think of her Dad and smile. It was like in an instant the years of pain just lifted away and she could breathe again.

This is the reason why I have been doing online group readings. It’s not about the individual messages as much as it is a learning experience for us all. The spirits have plenty to teach us and tell us. When we connect with them and listen to their messages, we realize that they never truly have left us. If you would like to attend the next online group reading with me, click here to register.