It was very specific to Jude. 😭 Matt is really quite amazing. I have been to see him before. This particular night he also spoke with 2 friends, one about his brother and father and the other about her infant son.
He was almost done and had gone from the row I was seated in to the back of the room saying “I need to come back here because there has been someone here all night”. He had the back row of guests stand and began to speak to them and ask questions. Of course we were all turned around in our chairs so we could see him. He asked “Who is cleaning off the grave?”
I didn’t speak at first because I felt he was too far away and it couldn’t be meant for me. Then he turned around, looked directly at me, made eye contact and asked again “Who here has recently been cleaning off or sweeping a grave? I see someone almost frantically doing this.”
He had turned and made direct eye contact with me. I felt like someone had slapped me in the back of the head (literally) so I spoke up and told him I had.
(This is the backstory, not shared with him or anyone! Just a few weeks before I had a mini breakdown when I went to the cemetery to bring an arrangement and there was so much snow and ice I couldn’t be sure if I was at the right spot. I dug through the snow until my hands bled, broke a snow brush from my car and finally just stopped. Exhausted and half hysterical. I went back to the car and called my husband sobbing.
When I got off the phone I went to visit our old neighbors for a while and unbeknownst to me at the time, my husband called my oldest son who went to the cemetery and finished what I had started. I later returned to find it cleared off and the arrangement placed on top. The only people who knew of that were myself, my husband and son. We had never spoken of it with anyone.)
Matt looked at me, pointed at me and said “YES! It’s you!” He came back and had our row stand and went on telling me ” She is here for you, she’s been back there all night just waiting! She wants me to acknowledge that she sends you signs all the time that she is still with you, but that you sometimes doubt them or think it’s just coincidence. She’s telling me to tell you it’s not.” ( Fact, I get feathers, coins and specific songs and phrases ALL THE TIME that I brush off)
I was shaking like a leaf!
He then said ” now this woman is older than you, and she took care of you but I don’t think it’s your mother, am I right? She wants you to know that she is still with you and she is still taking care of you”.
At that point I told him that both my mother and sister were buried together. Nothing else.
He said ” I feel like there is an important Anniversary coming up.” This person was usually the picture of health, I see her as a fighter, did she beat cancer once?” I acknowledged that she had. And said that the anniversary of my sisters death was March 2nd, but I didn’t say how many years.
Then he started gesturing around his abdomen saying ” there was a misdiagnosis or it took way too long to get a diagnosis or something and it was too late to for the doctors to anything. But she wants you to know that she is okay, she’s not angry and she knows that you did everything you could to help her. Do you understand that?” All I could do was shake my head. Then, still gesturing and his hand going in a circle around his abdomen he said “There was a growth, a mass or a tumor or something but it was unusual. Did it grow around something? I feel like it strangled or choked something off and that is why she died. Did she have cancer? I feel like she had cancer but there was something unusual about it”
I told him that yes, she had pancreatic cancer.
He said “But she didn’t die just because of the cancer, it was this twisting, choking thing that complicated it, do you understand that? Does that make any sense to you?” All I could do was nod. I was a mess! In fact she had blood clot, caused by the cancer, that choked off her portal vein.
“He then said “She was a real fighter, this one wasn’t she? (Laughing) I sense that she really didn’t want to give up and even though the doctors and everyone said one thing she is telling me that she proved them wrong! Do you know what that is about?” I literally choked out that after they told us she might have 3 days she fought for 17 more! So many of our loved ones have passed in the month of February and Judy was determined she wasn’t going to be one of them! Matt came closer to me then, I was about to fall over, and held my hand. He kept saying over and over to me “your sister wants you to know that she did not want to leave you and that she loves you and is still here with you. She wants you to know that she is still taking care of you and watching over you.”
Then he sort of giggled! And he said ” She is singing to me! Well, I don’t know if it’s to me! Do you know “You are my sunshine”? Is there significance to that because she is singing it!” I laughed out loud! I wasn’t really surprised! I told him how just a year ago we all were gathered in her hospital room and she wanted to sing the old songs like we did when we were younger. And the fact that she chose that one at that particular moment is significant because that is what she always sang to (my son) Jason! Jason was always her special “sunshine” and I wasn’t surprised that she would want to send him a message too.
Then it was his turn to be surprised! He said “Wait, are you telling me she JUST passed a year ago? Not even a year ago?” I acknowledged that and he went on to say how incredibly special it was that she was coming through. That I should indeed understand and accept that she is always with me because it is very rare for visits so soon after death, especially a lingering death.
Then he said “What the hell are you doing?!” And started laughing! He said “Ok, what’s with the boobs?” And was gesturing like he was pushing up boobs. 😂 He said “Did she have really big boobs or like to make jokes about her boobs or something? She is doing this (gesturing as if he had boobs) and she is laughing!” OMG! My sister Judy was the most modest person ever! I couldn’t even imagine so I said no, no, I don’t have any idea what that could all be about.
He took my hand again and said “Listen, she really wants you to hear this, she loves you, she really didn’t want to leave you and she’s still with you. She wants you to laugh again. She has been waiting in the back of the room all night to tell you, because it’s that important.” This would have been SO typical of my sister to stand in the wings to be sure everyone else got to hear from their loved ones first!
Then he finished up and thanked everyone and was done.
I went to see him afterward to get his book signed (because after that how could I not?!) and he just started laughing and said “You’ve got to figure out this boob thing because she’s still here with you and she just keeps laughing and doing this!” and he was gesturing again! LOL
After I got home and told Rob all about it and everything we were finishing dinner when my girlfriend that I had gone with messaged to make sure I was alright. She texted ” Gee have you figured out the boob thing yet?”
And as I was about to type “No I don’t have a clue” I had a very clear image of what it was!
There is a photo of her with my oldest daughter, at about 6-8 years old, Judy has on a sweater and under the sweater she had stuffed 2 massive balloons! She said at the time “When I’m gone, this is how you’ll remember me and you’ll laugh!” We always laughed over that memory and every time the picture would surface she would say the same thing!
I immediately called my daughter to tell her and even she remembers it and Auntie saying that!
So, needless to say, it was a very emotional evening. I truly never expected anything to happen, not that I wasn’t hopeful. I will tell you, my heart is in a different place today. ❤
I feel like I’ve been given another incredible gift. I no longer take signs for granted! In fact, I get incredible joy from each and every one and I know she IS still here taking care of me and we will be together again one day. In the meantime, I’ll enjoy the signs she sends. ❤️There are just so many things that Matt could not possibly have known about, starting with “who was cleaning off a grave?
I feel so blessed to have received this gift from Matt! I will forever be thankful!
Oh, and I have to tell you about my tattoo! Because her words (in her handwriting) are permanently etched on my arm! As I was cleaning out her house after her death I came across a note addressed to me in her nightstand 7 months after she passed. I had been contemplating a different tattoo in her memory when I found it. I’d been in the drawer before many times and had just not seen it (?) coincidence? I think not!
It reads: “God was so good to me you were here when I needed you most. I didn’t mean to leave you so soon. Know that I loved you dearly, and didn’t want to leave you ~ ” kind of eerie that Matt spoke those same words to me.
I know how blessed I have been, but truthfully, experiencing others on the receiving end of Matt’s gift is incredible too. Everyone should open their minds and hearts to experience this. It is truly life changing!