Losing a Loved One: Learning to Forgive Yourself

Losing a Loved One: Learning to Forgive Yourself

The death of a loved one is never easy, and for many people the pain is intensified by guilt. It’s easy to look back when everything is over and realize you could have done better.  It’s normal to have regrets – you wish you’d spent more time with them when they were alive; you weren’t with them when they passed over; you said something hurtful and never apologized – but remember, no relationship is perfect, and beating yourself up over something that can’t be changed isn’t healthy.

 

You Can’t Turn Back Time

 

I recently did a reading for a woman who had lost her brother to suicide. The moment I tuned into her energy I could feel her tremendous pain. She and her brother had a close relationship, and she had been aware of the emotional struggles he was going through and knew of his suicidal thoughts.

 

She had always done the best she could to support him. She would call him every day to check up on him and ask him how he felt. She constantly reassured him that she was there for him and loved him.

 

The night before his passing, she called him and right away sensed something was different. She asked him repeatedly if he was okay and he reassured her that he was fine. She kept her phone on that night and had it under her pillow in case he needed her. Unfortunately, the only call that came was to let her know that he had passed away.

 

Ever since that day she had been weighed down with grief and regret. She replayed the night over and over, imagining different scenarios where she rushed over, broke down the door, and saved him. She was drowning in guilt and emotional pain.

 

When her brother came through during our reading, his message was filled with love and healing words. He told her he appreciated her always being there for him, and that their relationship had been one of the best things in his life. He assured her that the suicide was not her fault, and that there was nothing she could have done to stop him.

 

Finally, he told her that he was happy in Heaven, and urged her to forgive herself so that she could heal and be happy too.

 

Allowing Yourself to Heal

 

One unfortunate reality of life is that you can’t control everything and everyone. The woman who lost her brother might have stopped him that night, only to lose him to suicide another day. People have free will, their own lessons to learn, and choices that only they can make. When someone passes, you can’t turn back the clock and bring them back for good, but there are ways to replace your grief and regret with loving memories.

 

Here are some techniques that can help:

 

1) Start by remembering the good times. Grief is funny. It blocks out all the happy memories and only leaves us with pain. Don’t let the good memories be lost. Think of the person when they were enjoying life, happy and healthy. Remember the experiences you shared, holidays, trips, inside jokes. Train yourself to replace the sad, regretful thoughts with memories that make you smile.

 

2) Look back on old photos. See the person when they were happy and vibrant. If you can, get a photo album or browse a social media page where there are pictures you haven’t seen before. Images of your loved one during family gatherings, celebrations, and vacations will help you remember them at their best – and keep them alive in your heart.

 

3) Talk about it. Sometimes people avoid bringing up the name of someone who has passed over. Do your best to break through that barrier and share a happy memory. Encourage other friends or family members to relay their own stories about the departed.  If you’re not ready to talk to family members or mutual friends of the deceased, consider a support group. Talking to others who have been through the same thing might be hard at first, but hearing what they have to say will help you

 

When I speak to the dead, one thing always comes through. They don’t want their death to hold you back. Guilt can prevent you from moving on with your life. Give yourself permission to be happy again and let go of the guilt and regret you’re holding on to.

 

If you would like to join me for an online group reading, you can sign up for one here. To make it even more special your family can attend with you and all you need is one ticket. Just make sure they are sitting with you on camera. It doesn’t matter where you live and you don’t need any fancy technology. All you need is a tablet, computer or a smartphone to be able to join.

 

I believe, the more that you learn about Heaven, the more that you learn that your loved ones are not far away. That’s exactly why I want to share my gift with you ! I hope that by attending an event with me, you’ll feel closer than ever to the people you love. I hope it helps you to open yourself up to sensing and feeling spirit and tuning into their special loving vibration!

 

I hope to see your face, and the faces of your loved ones in Heaven, on my computer screen during my next online event!

Forgiveness Sets YOU Free

Forgiveness Sets YOU Free

If you are a friend of mine on my Facebook Page, you will notice that I have been posting inspirational memes about forgiveness and letting go. It shocked me how many people replied with such negativity. It was very apparent to me that they were still hurting, sad and scarred from the negativity caused by someone they once knew, trusted and loved.

Forgiving and letting go after someone has done you wrong is indeed the hardest choice you can ever make, but it is one of the most important for you and for your health. Here’s why…

Negativity does not stay with the person you are upset with…

Some people feel that by holding grudges, it protects them from anyone else who tries to hurt them, including the person who hurt them. The truth is that the person who made you feel pain isn’t feeling that energy; you are. Although you think you may have it tucked deep down inside, the energy and pain are still living within you.

Situations we don’t find closure with lives within us and stops us from moving further in our life. Forgiveness does not mean the person was right; it means that you are freeing yourself from that negativity so you can live life again and put it out of mind.

Forgiveness allows you to feel free and happy again…

I was recently doing a psychic reading for a woman who waited over a year to talk to me. During our phone reading, she wanted advice and guidance from her mom who had died.

During her reading, her mom was talking about forgiveness. She had seen that her daughter was feeling lonely and disconnected. She wanted her daughter to make up with her kids and to put herself back out there into the dating world. She could see that her daughter would have the option of getting married again and of developing a close bond with her children.

During the reading, the mother’s spiritual guidance was very clear. She wanted her daughter to take back control of her life and to start to live again, but was her daughter ready to make the change?

Love & Divine Guidance from Heaven…

I personally love when the spirit comes through with wisdom and guidance. Those we love in spirit can see tomorrow so much more clearly than we can see yesterday.

When I started to deliver some of these messages to my client, she would not stop interrupting me. Instead of wanting to hear about her future, all she wanted to do was hear about her past. She wanted to know if the people who had hurt her felt pain, if her kids regretted what they had done and how they had treated her, if her family knew how judgmental they were, if her ex-husband’s new marriage would fail, and it just continued…

The more I tried to deliver her mother’s messages to her about the future, the more she would try to change the messages and make it about the past. Her mom didn’t want to talk about it. Her mom knew that her daughter had been dwelling on this for years and had pushed everyone away until finally, she was all alone living in the past.

My client at the time couldn’t see it. She thought by pushing everyone away and holding onto grudges, she was protecting herself. She felt it would make her feel better to think negatively about those who had hurt her. Instead, she was the problem to herself; she was closing her heart off and sinking into a depression.

Her mom had an important question for her: “ Are you ready to let go of the past and heal?” Her mom explained to her through me that she was trying to help her, but 25 mins of the reading were spent with daughter complaining and bringing up her painful past.

Finally, it just came out. I said, “Don’t you see what you are doing? Your mom is trying to talk to you and you keep blocking the messages. You  only want to relive your painful past.”

Her daughter stopped talking and remained quiet; suddenly, everything clicked. She saw that the pain was from holding on to the sadness for too long. She immediately began crying, and the pain was finally starting to release. She knew her mom was right; she had stopped living life because she was holding too much.

She didn’t date because of her failed marriage; she didn’t have friends because she was once deceived; she didn’t talk to her children because she felt they didn’t love her. Slowly but surely, she knew she needed to forgive and take her mom’s advice.

Forgiveness starts from the heart. It starts with YOU!

Over the past few weeks, she has started on the path of forgiveness. She first started with forgiving herself for her mistakes and for living in pain for so long. She forgave the grudges she held against her family and started to erase the painful memories from the past. She forgave her ex-husband and decided to put herself online and start to trust dating again.

You see, forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to ring someone’s doorbell and hug them. It all starts with you letting go of the pain and deciding to move forward.

In this case, there were some family members she couldn’t visit or talk to because the relationship was so bad. All she could do was forgive them in her heart and release the pain to the universe. What she could still repair was the relationship with her kids. She took a few weeks and then worked up the courage to grab the phone and call them. She set a date for them to meet up and talk, and they did.

It was not a joyous family reunion at first. In the beginning, it was awkward and emotionally painful, but she decided to push through it. She sat down and actually listened to what her kids had to say, and it was heavy. She cried but was ready for a change. For the first time ever, she was repairing and healing the past, not just living it. Her children forgave her and she forgave them. She was ready to put in the work, and it forever changed her life. They now talk every day, and she now has her family back.

Today, she is a different woman. She is finally living in the future. She is spending time with her grandchildren, dating an amazing man, and rediscovering her love of painting. She has even made like-minded friends by joining new classes. The people whom she once hated, no longer have control over her. She freed the energy and let go.

There is something we can all learn from this message from the spirit. Let go of the things weighing you down and take back control over your life. It may be painful at first, but it is worth the journey to heal and to be free.

If you enjoyed this blog post I would like to invite you to join my “Email from Heaven” monthly newsletter by clicking HERE. Each month I will send you my newest blog posts, videos and also a free gift to your inbox. I hope that my emails help you on your spiritual journey and help you stay connected to those you love and miss in Heaven.

Accepting, Forgiving and Letting Go

Accepting, Forgiving and Letting Go

Have you ever wished there was a moment in time when you could go back and change the past?

Have you ever felt emotionally responsible for something and wish you could let go of the guilt or hurt that it has caused you?

There are moments in life where we have to call upon Heaven and our Angels for divine help & healing either during or after a challenging situation. Whether it is death, tragedy or separation you have the ability to heal within, and Heaven will help you along the way. It all begins first with yourself and looking deeper into the situation that you are seeking healing over. Although it may be hard to revisit or think about a past situation that was painful sometimes its essential to be able to let go and to allow your soul to move forward.

Healing begins with acceptance and forgiveness and letting go. I know that these may seem like hard words to chew and more importantly you probably have heard them time and time again but the secret is looking at them on a deeper level.

Instead of thinking about the traditional meaning behind the words think about how these words can help you in feeling better and allowing yourself to live a happier life. Let these words uplift you and more importantly be the change that you need…

Acceptance: The meaning is knowing and reassuring yourself that you cannot change the past but you can change the future. Acceptance reminds us that it is not healthy to dwell on a past situation but to learn from it and make appropriate changes within life. The reason why is because life is constant and ongoing we are all here to make mistakes to learn, teach and inspire others. It can help to remember that earth is the classroom and Heaven is where we retire in paradise with others who have completed their life journey.

If your are having a hard time accepting the passing of a loved one you can remember that acceptance does not mean your okay with what had happened. It just means that you will accept the passing knowing that you will meet again and that your loved one is with you just in a different way.

Forgiveness: Being able to forgive others from the past but most of all yourself. So many times you may be faced with thinking about a situation that you may hold yourself accountable for. Even if it was something that you could have prevented know that it is ok to forgive yourself. So many times the past can bring back hard memories but when a painful memory surfaces replace it by changing your thoughts around to a happy one. Having control of your thought process will help you with the forgiveness stage. it’s OK to tell yourself that you are sorry for what had happened and begin to heal. If the situation laid with someone else at fault forgive them from the bottom of your heart. Forgiveness does not mean they are right, it is a gift that you give yourself. No matter what the situation is forgiveness allows you to let go of years of hurt, pain and suffering allowing your soul to be free.

Letting Go: Allowing your soul to let go of the pain, sadness and hurt but more importantly holding on to the lessons you were taught. Letting go does not mean you forget about the person or situation, you just decide you will let go of the painful emotions around it and allow your soul to be at peace. Letting go is the biggest step because you begin to let go of the sadness and hurt and invite happiness within your life.

Here are some exercises you can do to help you Accept, Forgive and Let Go:

Write a letter expressing your thoughts and feelings over a situation. It can be a letter saying you are letting go of the situation or a letter forgiving a person that caused you pain or suffering. Write it but don’t send it. Instead, take it and hand it over to the Universe and Heaven to take care of. You can let it go to the wind, cut it up or burn it.  Know that the letter and situation is now in Heavens hands. Let your Angels take care of the past.

Take a healing walk with your Angels. Go outside and tell your Angels that you need there help with healing. Invite them in and as you are walking tell them all the things that have been bothering you in details. As you are speaking your Angels are listening to you. Ask them to help take the pain away and lead you on  path to happiness.

Create a future plan. So many times the past can hold you back from doing so many things. Take your life back in your hands by mapping out life goals and an action plan for yourself. Think of what you want most in life and create a vision board and write it down.

Believe In Yourself. Part of the healing process is believing and encouraging yourself. Heaven and your Angels believe in you and so should you! Healing is a way of life. Take a class, start exercising or find an activity to help lift you up.

Practice random acts of kindness. After you accepted that you cannot change the past, take a step forward and make someones day with positivity. Tell those around you how deeply you feel and care about them. Hold doors open and smile often. Doing positive things for others will lift you up and heal your soul.

Remember that we are all students here on Earth living life learning the lessons that God has in store for us. In the end we are all reunited with those we have ever lost in Heaven where there are no grudges, burdens, guilt or anger. Heaven is the ultimate paradise filled with love and peace. All of the heavy emotions are dropped as someone’s soul makes its way to Heaven so that they can be at peace. None of those emotions or past experiences are brought with them. That being said lets make Heaven a place on earth, you have the power to drop the heavy emotions now and embrace happiness. Heaven will help you along the way!

If you enjoyed this blog post I would like to invite you to join my “Email from Heaven” monthly newsletter by clicking HERE. Each month I will send you my newest blog posts, videos and also a free gift to your inbox. I hope that my emails help you on your spiritual journey and help you stay connected to those you love and miss in Heaven.

 

 

7 Steps to Finding Happiness in Your Life…

7 Steps to Finding Happiness in Your Life…

We all have the power to create happiness within our lives. Here are a few ways to help us achieve and create happiness in our own lives and also in the lives of others.

  1. Accept yourself for who you are.

You are an amazing and unique person who is one of a kind! Accept the fact that you are perfect just the way that you are. When you accept yourself, you also begin to accept those around you. This allows you to let down your walls and embrace your life regardless of any flaws or imperfections you may think that you have. You have to remember that being kinder to yourself not only relieves stress and tension, but it also allows you to look at life through a whole new perspective. Take some time to have a “me day.” Pamper yourself or just go for a walk and get back in touch with your inner self. It may just be the best thing you do.

  1. Try to always stay positive.

We all have those days when it feels like things are going in the wrong direction. You have to remember that you have all the tools you need to find the positive outcome in every situation. As the saying goes, “Life goes on.” It is important to remember that the struggles you may face today are life lessons that are helping shape the way for a beautiful, new future to come. Learn from each obstacle and jump over them to create the perfect future.

  1. Practice random acts of kindness.

What if I told you that you can change your whole day around by just being kind to others? Simple things like smiling, holding doors open for others, complimenting a stranger or helping someone in need can help you to make the most out of your day. One good deed starts a chain reaction that encourages others around you to also be kind to others. I personally believe that the more positive, kind and helpful you are towards others, the more you attract that same energy and like-minded people into your life.

  1. Let go of grudges and act on forgiveness.

When you forgive someone in your heart, you let go of so much anger, stress and hurt. Simply forgiving someone in your head and heart allows you to move out of the past and into the future. It is like a coat of heavy armor finally being removed and allowing you to feel at peace with the past.

  1. No regrets, just love.

Live life with no regrets from your past. Every choice you have made has shaped the life that you are living today. Any opportunity that was meant for you in the past will always come back around if it was meant to be. Focus on the future, creating new opportunity, setting goals and moving toward things that will make you happy.

  1. Avoid negative talk about yourself and others.

Why waste your day talking negatively about people or situations when all that it will do is upset you? Start switching to conversations that will bring you joy and make you feel good. Focusing more on topics that will make you laugh or bring you down memory lane is a perfect way to help create happiness in your day. Complimenting others is also another great way because it lets the person you are talking to feel more comfortable around you and let their guard down.

  1. Be thankful every day.

Gratitude is SO important to everyday happiness. Sometimes, it is so easy to get lost in all the things that we think we need or want that we forget all the beautiful blessings that are in our lives every day. As Oprah Winfrey once said, “The single greatest thing you can do to change your life today would be to start being grateful for what you have right now. And the more grateful you are, the more you get.”

If you enjoyed this blog post I would like to invite you to join my “Email from Heaven” monthly newsletter by clicking HERE. Each month I will send you my newest blog posts, videos and also a free gift to your inbox. I hope that my emails help you on your spiritual journey and help you stay connected to those you love and miss in Heaven.

Are My Loved Ones in Heaven Still Angry with Me?

Are My Loved Ones in Heaven Still Angry with Me?

Your loved one in Heaven wants you to know that they love and care about you. So many times, our loved ones pass unexpectedly, or we don’t get to speak to them before they passed, leaving you with the question: Are they mad at me?

The answer is no, not at all; they love you. Please know that if you have had an unresolved conflict or a disagreement with someone that had passed, they hold no grudges, just unconditional love. When our loved ones pass and go to the other side, they are all loving and non-judgmental. You see, emotions such as anger and disappointment are emotions that we experience here in the physical world but leave us as we make our transition to Heaven.

When your loved one makes their trip to that beautiful paradise in the sky, they must forgive all those whom they had disagreed with here on Earth and transition into the beautiful and all-loving paradise of Heaven. You have to remember that Earth is the classroom, and Heaven is paradise. When someone passes, they really don’t go that far. Although they are not able to communicate by phone or through letters like we do here, they send us signs all the time to let us know that they are with us. The good news is that you can speak to them whenever you choose, and they are always there to listen. Even if you did not get to say goodbye or tell them how you really felt, the time is never too late. You can speak to them now, and they will hear you.

After all, it’s never goodbye. It’s “I’ll see you later.”

If you enjoyed this blog post I would like to invite you to join my “Email from Heaven” monthly newsletter by clicking HERE. Each month I will send you my newest blog posts, videos and also a free gift to your inbox. I hope that my emails help you on your spiritual journey and help you stay connected to those you love and miss in Heaven.

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