I lost the love of my life of 26 years to Lung Cancer.

John & I married young & raised two terrific kids together. Our feelings for each other was just like our wedding song, Endless Love.   That is what we were to each other, endless love. After 25 years of marriage we still hug and kiss hello or goodbye. When we walked together or just sat next to each other we were always holding hands.Then on a warm spring day in April my world changed.

With our family and friends in the room John opened his eyes. I took his hand and told him that I was with him. He slightly squeezed my hand and he was gone. In one moment I lost the love of my life. We had been together since I was 18. How in the world do I live without him?

All of a sudden  our house seem too big and empty without him. I miss seeing him coming in through the door at the end of the day. The nights were the hardest. I found it hard to fall asleep without him. I kept wondering if John made it to heaven and was he OK? I needed to know this. There was nothing I could do to make it better. I started to where John’s watch to feel closer to him.

I missed my daily hug and kiss from him so I placed a picture of him on the refrigerator and hug the fridge while I get the picture a good morning or goodnight kiss. I started to feel him with me daily but I didn’t know was it him or my mind playing tricks on me because I missed him so much.

It was then my mother read in the local paper that Matt Fraser was coming into town she wanted to know if I wanted to go. My mother was very close to John and she was missing him as if she was missing her own son. I jumped at the chance of maybe John would come through at the show. No such luck at first. It took almost 3 years of going to Matt’s show before something happened. Matt came up to me and said I want you to know your dad is here today. Huh? What? My mind was stuck. My dad?

Matt went on to tell me your father knows you are waiting for someone else but he wanted to connect with you today. He is holding a baby in his arms. Does this make sense? I said yes I lost the baby in a miscarriage and my twin sister died two weeks before we were born. Matt went on to let us know my dad watches over us and everyone is safe in heaven. At the end of the night both my mother and I were happy with the reading.

I was sure John was going to come through with the next show with Matt. The show with Matt came to our area. I just knew John would come through. And he did!   It was the last reading of the night. Matt had the whole row stand up. He looked right at me and said did you lose your husband?

Yes! John was going to let me know he was OK! I then told Matt yes. He looked right at me and said are you wearing your husband’s watch?  (The watch was not showing it was covered up by my coat!) I showed him the watch and gave a brief explanation on why I was wearing it.

Matt was spot on with everything! He said your husband didn’t want to die and fought very hard to live. I told him yes. Then Matt looked at me with a smile and   And says what’s with the picture? Your husband keeps showing me a picture does this mean anything to you? I started to laugh  I went on to tell Matt & the room that I missed John so much that I have his picture on the fridge to kiss and a hug the fridge thinking that it’s John because I miss his hugs so much.

The room laughed I laughed I could feel John smiling at me. Matt then went on to tell me   John is with me and he just leaned over and gave me a kiss on the cheek! My endless love is still with me! I can remember after the show I kept telling my mother he came through! He came through!

It’s been a few months since the reading. I don’t feel as alone as I did before. I still miss him and kiss his photo and hug the refrigerator every day. It’s still the closest way I can hug him back when I can feel him hugging me.

I am so glad Matt wants to share his family gift to help others like me who are missing their love ones thank you Matt!

 

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