Alexa says I’m pretty predictable, and I guess she’s right. I admit it, I’m a creature of habit!I almost always start my day with loud music while I get ready, followed by a quick trip to Dunkin’ donuts for coffee and a chocolate glazed. After every one of my live events, (except during Covid) I have to go out for a late meal (usually to cheesecake factory) , and I always get dessert. Oh, and I also have a hard time passing a shoe store without going in.
I enjoy my routines and rituals. They’re comfortable, and they help me feel like I’m in control of my day. But habits like singing along with Donna Summer in the morning are different from destructive patterns that block you from having the life you want. That’s when being predictable isn’t so good.
Recognizing your Destructive Patterns.
It’s easy to fall into negative behavior patterns without even realizing it – and suddenly you’re asking yourself why you have the same issues over and over again and feeling like the whole world is out to get you.
Examples:
- Do your friends roll their eyes every time you tell them you’ve met someone new and swear that this time it’s going to be different?
- Are you constantly worried about money, but you can’t seem to get a decent paying job or control your spending?
- Are you always sick and tired, battling one health issue after another
- Do you sabotage relationships with friends and co-workers, and you can’t figure out why wherever you go, the same thing keeps happening?
Positive Thinking is Just the Beginning.
They say that life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. I’m a big believer in positive thinking and manifesting what you want in life, but I also know that everything isn’t going to go your way all the time and that’s okay. Sometimes life sends you challenges to teach you lessons and make you stronger.
It’s not until you actually recognize what’s going on and make the decision to change course that you break the cycle. These are called learning cycles, and they help you to grow.
Searching for her Father’s Love
I once knew a girl named Amanda who could never find love. Even though she wanted to be in a committed relationship more than anything, she would date men that were not serious about her. She seemed to be a magnet for abusive men who didn’t care about her, until suddenly she saw the pattern, and did some soul searching.
Amanda realized all the men she had dated reminded her of her Dad, who left her when she was young. A lightbulb went on! She realized she was trying to replace the love she hadn’t gotten from her dad with these other unavailable, uncaring men.
The moment she realized what was going on she knew what she had to do. She started listing out what she really wanted in a relationship. She wanted a potential husband, someone who was respectful and loving, and who she could depend on.
She decided to change course and try online dating to find someone new. She was going to avoid her old type and seek out a man who met her new requirements. Guess what? The moment she changed her path, her soulmate appeared.
What Does it Take to Break a Pattern?
To find love, Amanda had to do more than just “think positive.” She had to go through a process, and she couldn’t do it until she admitted she had a problem. The steps she went through can help break any kind of negative pattern whether it involves relationships, money, health, or career.
Five Steps to Breaking Negative Cycles.
- Recognize the situation for what it is, and don’t sugarcoat it. Amanda kept making excuses for the men in her life and ignoring the warning signs when she met someone new. It wasn’t until she realized she was picking the same type over and over that she was able to address the problem.
- Realize that the common denominator is you. If the same thing happens with every job you have or every person you date, it’s not just bad luck. In order to break the cycle, you need to change your mindset, and your behavior.
- Realize the WHY of what’s happening. Amanda finally realized she was looking to replace her father’s love. That insight helped her break the pattern. Everyone’s WHY is different. Someone who was ignored by their parents might create a lot of drama as an adult because they still crave the attention they missed when they were young.
- Fear is not your friend. I notice a lot of people who are always worried about their health seem to be sick all the time. Fear can attract exactly what you don’t want. When you feed into a fear, you give it life. Instead focus your energy into positive thoughts.
- Close out your learning cycle by deciding exactly what you do want. Make a list, create a vision board, post positive affirmations where you can see them often. Focusing your energy in a positive direction will attract a boost from the universe to help get you there!
If you’re not happy with your relationship, your job, your financial situation, your health, or anything else in your life, know that you have the power to change. There’s no time like the present, because no one knows what tomorrow will bring.
I talk to souls in heaven every day who regret ignoring opportunities to learn lessons and make the changes that would have made their experience on earth better and happier. Looking back, they see the lost opportunity, and realize that they could have broken the negative cycles that kept them from living their best life.
These are just some of the many life lessons and spiritual teachings I have learned from those in spirit. If you have found this helpful, I would like to share with you my new inspirational audio class series. You can start listening right now by Clicking Here. I hope it helps you on your own spiritual journey.
Responses
I want to connect with one special person.
I am hopping to hear from my loved one so much. I hope you will try to get a chance to talk to my loved one.
Thank you matt, you always come through with the things i need to help me just when i need it
Thank you for passing on what you are learning from our loved ones this has help me be focus grounded, I am always looking for signs from my mum she is near me and she does help to guide me thank you Matt x
Would love a reading
Emma from Australia
Thank you so much. This explains so much . I have felt so much heart ache from my family and guys I have dated and now with my last job and the one have now . So toxic.
I know now I need to change a lot . I don’t want to go through the rest of my life sad, depressed and unhappy. Thank you thank you
I am sad cause I lost my first born son in a horrible way I can’t even recover even if I try I honestly don’t know what really happen an I can’t stop thinking what could off cause his death
Yes my Mom and Dad. I need to know that everything is going to be ok with us. I know my Mom watches out for me. It is money and health. Tell them both I love and miss them so much!!!! Oh by there names are Myron and Ruby Hileman. Please and. Thank you so much!!!!!
I want to connect with my parents please and see if I am on the right track with my job
Hello inspiring story i was scheduled to do the online zoom 10/11 i missed it can i do another day
What a special way to offer your gift to others! Thank you for doing what you do…every day. You help others to grieve in a healthier way, to heal from their losses & maybe even turn them into positive energy! I’m trying to do that now, given the loss of our 3 year old grandson. Need to keep working on this!Thank you Matt!
Wow, did this ever hit home. My relationships and my jobs are like a living hell. You explained the relationship one, what about the job? I keep finding jobs I think are good for me and end up to be very toxic.
Oh Matt, I’m such a sad person! My mom had terminal cancer and was bed ridden for 18 months. I was with her every night for dinner and then helping the aide put her to bed, I would hold my sweet mothers hand till she fell asleep each night. She finally passed November 4th, 2015 and I believe she is in a better place with her mom and dad right now but I miss her so very much! It wasnt bad enough that I suffered her loss, my husband of 15 years left me 2 weeks later. I’ve been stuck all this time and I dont know what to do. Thank you for letting me tell you my story.
Oh so sorry about your mum,you cant replace her but I think shes safe and happy now ,but I feel you can replace your husband and find better I bet your mum will help with this sending you lots of love Elaine x
Thank you Matt , I know all about this however sometimes you need to be reminded..
Thank you for this. There is a lot to learn from. I have come to realize more about death and how it affects me in the negative manner. I want to be able to move on and it is possible, I just have to find my way. You have helped me so much. Thank you Matt.
My family.and I cannot wait.for.our.reading with you on Nov 5th @7 pm. Do i remember hearing you say someone would email me a link to get on to the reading?? Please let me know.
Thank you Matt for showing me that there is a more positive way to move on after the death of my husband. You are such an inspiration.
Thank you Matt, you are spot on..
It’s hard as a human to accept change because we want so much to believe that Love can conquer all .myself I’ve been severely Depressed because of the pandemic and started alot of problems with my kids regardless whether my adult kids talk to me or not I have been given the gift of being alive and I plan to think more positive to achieve my dreams even though I do have health problems I pray that I can live the rest of my life to the fullest of my ability and try to be happy for once in my life I’ve had enough of heartache to last me two lifetimes and I want to try to be happy
Thank you Matt sweetheart, I really need to make some changes in my life, as I’m turning 40 this weekend. I was always this happy person who turned out to feel unhappy, unsatisfied, and even unachieved. I will make a list, create a vision board, post positive affirmations where I can see them often, and last but not least Focusing my energy in a positive direction! Thank you for this message today love!
(btw, I missed my last online meeting due to a post-surgery, let me know if it’s possible to reschedule, txs!)
I lost my husband of 20 yrs when I was 48 .. now here I am 64 and still single. I met the most amazing man last year whom was also widowed and we connected instantly when we met
However it was long distance 600 miles away & hard to see each other as much as he desired. I pray daily for this man to come back into my life oneday. I wish I could move on with my feelings & start dating but I for some odd reason feel this man & I will get back together … Be still anxious ♥️
Hi I saw an aspiration one evening in my living room. I didn’t say anything as my boyfriend doesn’t believe in what he can’t see or touch. I read one of your articles about talking to the aspiration. So I did. About a week later at 12:30 am I saw a bright sparkler type light come out of my ceiling. Lasted about 30 seconds and was gone. Scariest thing…when a dark figure got in my face and said “ your breath stinks’ and laughed and disappeared. Anybody know if I need to be afraid?
Thank you Matt I need to make changes in my life As well… Reading this message You posted opened my eyes sweetheart thanks again and God bless you ???
These people you spoke with is in heaven. What about those that is in hell can you reach out to them.
My life changed on 31st July, i finally found my soulmate but he was my dog Pascal,ive lost and loved alot of dogs ect over my life but he was so very different, the connection was very strong, him to me and me to him,im stuck on that day and the grief is unbearable,he was my rock for 13 yrs, the guilt i carry from not being able to protect him from congestive heart failure is terrible, i can not wait to be with him again, but in the mean time i can not enjoy life anymore, thank you Matt for all the help you give people, i love watching your readings, i cry with them xx
Hi Matt. You are so right..My life has been quite a life lesson for me but I made the decision to change what and how I did things in my life and truly I have been blessed with nothing but positive outcomes. I lost my Mom the beginning of the year and prior to that she told me she would pray for me while she was alive and even when she dies..and I am a firm believer that she is with me all the time the blessings have been above and beyond! Thank you for who you are..truly a gift..
I will be attending your live online event on November 5. Can’t wait!
Can not wait to see or hear from you. Is this group meeting means you can see me? Give a reading?
Was very interesting to read
Dearest Matt,
Thank you so much for this beautiful message.
It was my story until 5 months ago. I found the love of my life at the age of 70, he is 68.
Even a 33 year marriage was plagued by what you describe here. My prayer is that your message will be heard.
We love you sweet man. Thank you for all you are.
First and foremost …. You my aruma of nothing but positive feelings when I see you and I love watching you do your readings you funny down to earth and you crack me up sometimes when you’re like no way LOL your girlfriend is beautiful you’re gorgeous beautiful beautiful smile you have and you’re way positive energy is just with you at all times and I so enjoy watching you actually I tried so hard to get red because of a lot but I didn’t get it when I you’re doing your online and I understand and it’s okay but I have such major problems right now and that I don’t care how old we are we never stop learning you know I’m very old-fashioned I guess and I always think of when you love somebody or better or worse richer or poorer with that being said I don’t give in and give up easy in life but only to the people in this new man that’s in my life okay 20 some years of a bad bad bad marriage and all the other guys after we’re all the same type and I’m when counseling got a beautiful daughter out of that awful marriage and it was worth every stay and that’s why I stayed but I don’t can’t tell you how many times I have given everything up just to get the hell away from them this one I have now is going on seven years and I’m dealing with someone with a slight or deep I don’t know mental condition and I know a lot about it I study some of it my mother was a schizophrenic so I’m very intelligent and I’m very into my surroundings I watch everything people don’t know what I cuz I’m blonde and blue eyes they think I’m a dumb blonde LOL but I’m far from it cuz I don’t miss nothing nothing very intentative to my surroundings if that’s the right word anywho I have no idea at this point I’m lost okay I’m really ready to throw in the towel because I’m mentally breaking down too many too many things has been gone on in my life since the day I was born and I find myself questioning do you stay if you love somebody and try to help them is he playing games with me like I’m sorry we still don’t know men’s minds and then don’t know our mind now I am a very very very easy person to get along with I’m simple I don’t want money I don’t care about money well I need it we need to survive it but it’s not my big bang in life my biggest thing is my family and love I’m very very big-hearted person and I am a person that feels other people’s pain I get sad by it because it feels I feel it in me and I can’t help that in a way it’s good but in a way it’s a curse so I don’t know if do I throw in this hollow he doesn’t abuse me hit me but verbally it is abusive in a way I’ve been researching and researching and trying to help him but these behaviors have been going on for way too when do I just give up
I WANT NEED SO SO BAD FOR YOU TO READ ME OR HAVE A LOT OF NO ANSWERS TO THAT I NEED TO KNOW IN MY LIFE OF PEOPLE AND MY FAMILY THAT PASSED THAT IS ACTUALLY TEARING ME APART INSIDE I WANT SO BAD TO GET TO GET READ BY YOU SO SO SO SO BAD YOU’RE SUCH A GREAT GREAT PERSON I COULD SEE IT AND I LOVE YOUR ENERGY ❤️❤️❤️? YOUR GIRLFRIEND AND YOU MAKE A PERFECT COUPLE YOU’RE GORGEOUS SHE’S BEAUTIFUL YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY STUNNING SO SMILE THOSE TEETH YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL HONEY PLEASE HELP ME I NEED TO REREAD SO BAD THIS IS YEARS OF MY SUFFERING INTERNALLY FROM SOME THINGS I NEED ANSWERED SO SAD I SO MUCH THINGS IN MY LIFE GOING ON AND IT’S JUST I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE SAYING BECAUSE YOU TOTALLY IS WHAT I’M THINKING ? PS YOUR GIRL BETTER HOLD ON TO YOU BECAUSE IF NOT I’M COMING OUT TO GET YOU LOL YOU’RE SO STUNNING AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL SO YOU’RE FUNNY AND SHE’S GORGEOUS SO YOU GUYS MAKE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL COUPLE BUT I STILL THINK YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY STUNNING JUST SAYING I’LL GRAB YOU IN A HEARTBEAT ??
Hi Matt, even though we didn’t get read when we attended a week ago, we still found you very entertaining! You have a natural gift of helping others. I hope you see how much you help some that really need it. You make everyone smile and laugh and you completely surprise your group by how you read them.
Crossing finger my loved ones come through on Nov 5th. I’m really excited to be a part of this experience. ?? May you continue to be blessed
Hi matt first time to watch you i was amazed that you have a wonderful gift. I was desperate to have a reading from you..my mom past away yr 2016 i came back home from L.A and able to see her for 2 days after that she died.
A lot of people just told me she just waited for me to come home before she will forever closed her eyes. We didnt talk to much when we saw each other cause she hardly cant speak ..i know she want to say alot of things for me..please help me to have a reading from you..i want to have peace of mind cause until now i know she have an important things to say to me.
I see lots of orbs in my house and a strange sound that is almost like a clearing of the throat. Saturday morning I had a scratching on my pillow. I had someone tell me I may be in portal since there is so much activity. I only noticed this until I put up motion cameras in my basement. One lady said she talked with an Indian chief that is looking for his sister. My dogs have sensed something at times. Can you tell me anything to help? I have several videos.
Hi Matt, I have lost my husband and my son. My husband has been gone 6 years now and I have wanted to meet someone to have dinner with and maybe be friends with. 3 years ago, I met a man on line and the he started writing to me on email. I did want to fall in love with him, but I totallly fell in love with him and we have never met. Now, since he found out, I am older than he, he has gotten cool with me, but says he still loves me, but I don’t hear from him like I did. I am totally in love with him and now I wish I had fallen in love with him, but now my heart is broken. I don’t have any one else that I have met and I don’t know if I will ever meet anyone else. I think my husband, in heaven, is keeping me from meeting anyone and wanting me to not find anyone else. I was married to him a long time. I don’t look my age and everyone thinks I look the age of my sons, but I can’t get this other man off my mind and I have never met him, so I think that is a hopeless situatio
I wish I could get a reading to find out if my husband is protecting me and doesn’t want me to find anyone else, but I get so lonely living by myself. I don’t know what to do now and how to heal my broken heart with this other guy. I do not know if he will get back in touch with me or not.
I have lost about everyone I love. I need my mommy so bad. Could just run away never looking back
Hi Matt, thank you for this Blog. Whilst reading it a thought came into my head, “I am big so that I am noticed”. As a child, I always felt invisible and this is the first time I have thought of my health issues coming from this. Now is the time to change my mindset and move on-wards and upwards. I’m excited. Thanks again.
Good morning Matt,and thank you so much for all your inspiration I definitely am looking forward to meeting you via online on November 8th can’t wait. Yes I couldn’t agree more,my mom was a determined woman who had so much hope in living her dream,but unfortunately due to her severe illness and financial crisis she was unable to live her dream because of fear and every night when I think of her the biggest pain I feel inside my heart and soul is that my mother left and never lived her life. I cry every time I remember how her hopes and dreams were shattered the minute she took her last breath and to know that all mom had to do was to let go and change her way of life. That things would had probably had a better outcome for her or she would have been happier.
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